R.I.P Po-Po

Emily's favorite security pillow she calls Po-Po has been laid to rest. It is beyond repair, needs stuffing and has major rips and the material is soooo very see through.  Emily has had her Po-Po for 8 years and was a little sad to see her go, but she is happy we got to do a little "memorial"  Oh I love my kids... They are soo funny.  Po-Po served many years with Emily keeping her from being afraid of the boogie man under her bed and in her closet she said,  she also said that her Po-Po dried her tears and wiped her nose. lol

Here are a few photos of Po-Po and Emily:

THE END!!  RIP PO-PO 

R.I.P Po-Po

Emily's favorite security pillow she calls Po-Po has been laid to rest. It is beyond repair, needs stuffing and has major rips and the material is soooo very see through.  Emily has had her Po-Po for 8 years and was a little sad to see her go, but she is happy we got to do a little "memorial"  Oh I love my kids... They are soo funny.  Po-Po served many years with Emily keeping her from being afraid of the boogie man under her bed and in her closet she said,  she also said that her Po-Po dried her tears and wiped her nose. lol

Here are a few photos of Po-Po and Emily:

THE END!!  RIP PO-PO 

{Tomorrow}

Tomorrow

Annie:

The sun'll come out tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar
That tomorrow there'll be sun

Just thinkin' about tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs
And the sorrow 'til there's none

When I'm stuck with a day
That's gray and lonely
I just stick out my chin
And grin and say, oh

The sun'll come out tomorrow
So you gotta hang on 'til tomorrow
Come what may

Tomorrow, tomorrow
I love you tomorrow
You're always a day away

The sun'll come out tomorrow
So you gotta hang on 'til tomorrow
Come what may

Tomorrow, tomorrow
I love you tomorrow
You're always a day away

Tomorrow, tomorrow
I love you tomorrow
You're always a day away

The above photos are of me as a child, I loved the movie Annie and I knew every single word to most of the songs, although "Tomorrow" was my favorite.  To this day I still know every word to this song :)

{Tomorrow}

Tomorrow

Annie:

The sun'll come out tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar
That tomorrow there'll be sun

Just thinkin' about tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs
And the sorrow 'til there's none

When I'm stuck with a day
That's gray and lonely
I just stick out my chin
And grin and say, oh

The sun'll come out tomorrow
So you gotta hang on 'til tomorrow
Come what may

Tomorrow, tomorrow
I love you tomorrow
You're always a day away

The sun'll come out tomorrow
So you gotta hang on 'til tomorrow
Come what may

Tomorrow, tomorrow
I love you tomorrow
You're always a day away

Tomorrow, tomorrow
I love you tomorrow
You're always a day away

The above photos are of me as a child, I loved the movie Annie and I knew every single word to most of the songs, although "Tomorrow" was my favorite.  To this day I still know every word to this song :)

Webkins..

My girls are all into the Webkins,  the cute little stuffed animals they can interact with online.  They are really cute stuffed animals.  They all three now have one each and want to add to their collection already lol  Here is a photo of the girls with their webkins.

Webkins..

My girls are all into the Webkins,  the cute little stuffed animals they can interact with online.  They are really cute stuffed animals.  They all three now have one each and want to add to their collection already lol  Here is a photo of the girls with their webkins.

Happy 7th Birthday Natalie

So hard to believe that my baby, my last born is 7 today.  She has grown so much and is so very smart. I am very proud of her and all her accomplishments.  She is a tomboy with a little hint of girl in her.  lol She likes a lot of boys toys, likes to dress like a boy (nothing to glittery or foo foo) she has to play boy in all games with her sisters,  BUT she still likes girl stuff too.  Hannah told her one day she would pay her a $1.00 if she wore a dress and Natalie told her no way that is not enough money. lol  She is sooo funny.  She is definitely a tomboy. :)

Here is a photo of her at birth and now.  Happy Birthday Natalie Alice ..

Happy 7th Birthday Natalie

So hard to believe that my baby, my last born is 7 today.  She has grown so much and is so very smart. I am very proud of her and all her accomplishments.  She is a tomboy with a little hint of girl in her.  lol She likes a lot of boys toys, likes to dress like a boy (nothing to glittery or foo foo) she has to play boy in all games with her sisters,  BUT she still likes girl stuff too.  Hannah told her one day she would pay her a $1.00 if she wore a dress and Natalie told her no way that is not enough money. lol  She is sooo funny.  She is definitely a tomboy. :)

Here is a photo of her at birth and now.  Happy Birthday Natalie Alice ..

Wordless Wednesday {a day late}

Wordless Wednesday {a day late}

Lazy bones..

What a rough life to just lounge around on the couch all day.. lol Frank is a spoiled rotten pug!!

Lazy bones..

What a rough life to just lounge around on the couch all day.. lol Frank is a spoiled rotten pug!!

Good news..

We are moving...


I know to some that might not seem like good news, BUT it is to us for many reasons.  We live in a duplex now with noisy jerk neighbors who are VERY inconsiderate. They slam their doors all hours of the day and rattle the walls.  They have about 5 cars and leave no where to park.  They have surround sound on their tv and rattle the picture frames on our joined wall. They hang their laundry all OVER the fence (front and back) to dry instead of using their dryer (yes they have one) it looks soooo tacky to see undies and bras hanging on your fence. I could go on but you get the point.

So I have been looking for another place for a very long time that is within our budget and something that will be better than sharing a wall with a neighbor (even a house in town would have made me happy) until one day I was on craigslist and I saw an ad for a 3 bed 2 bath home on 20 acres.  It caught my eye and I opened the ad, It is still here in Lincoln and it was like a dream come true.  In our budget too.  So I sent them an email and figured since the ad was 4 days old that it was already rented due to the fact that homes around here on acreage DO not last long especially at that great of a price.  I got an email back the next day saying that it was still available and to call them.  So we did and well the rest is history. We got to go look at it and fell in love.  The owners are an elderly couple who are just absolutely so sweet and kind.  They live on the 20 acres as well.  The property is fenced and overlooks the town of Lincoln and you can even see the Sutter Buttes from the house.  They have a beautiful pond on the property as well.  We got to go in and look at the home and it is HUGE over 1400 sq. feet and sooo nice.  I cannot wait to start our life out there.  It has a oversized 2 car garage.  They have a 8 stall barn, lighted arena, and a hay barn as well.  Since they are elderly they sold all their horses and are happy to be renting to someone who will possibly be owning a horse in the near future.  I want my girls to have that experience like I did.  They are open to animals even for the girls to do 4-H.

I cannot tell you how excited we are,  girls are excited too but they are just concerned about having to move schools which I will not do to them in the middle of the school year.  Next year they will go to the school closer to us and probably ride the bus.  Hannah doesn't want to ride the bus but she says she will, she says she doesn't want to have to keep her sisters in check. lol  God I love her!!  Our last day as city folks is December 10th and then we become country bumpkins.  I was born and raised a country bumpkin so this is not new to me,  Steve on the other hand is a total city boy but he has been wanting out of the city for some time now.  Just to have some peace and quiet.  Moving this close to Christmas is going to suck but we will be ok.  We will make do. Now the packing begins.. fun!  Anyone who wants to help pack come on over.. I will supply the food and drinks.. lol lol

Finally good news!!

Good news..

We are moving...


I know to some that might not seem like good news, BUT it is to us for many reasons.  We live in a duplex now with noisy jerk neighbors who are VERY inconsiderate. They slam their doors all hours of the day and rattle the walls.  They have about 5 cars and leave no where to park.  They have surround sound on their tv and rattle the picture frames on our joined wall. They hang their laundry all OVER the fence (front and back) to dry instead of using their dryer (yes they have one) it looks soooo tacky to see undies and bras hanging on your fence. I could go on but you get the point.

So I have been looking for another place for a very long time that is within our budget and something that will be better than sharing a wall with a neighbor (even a house in town would have made me happy) until one day I was on craigslist and I saw an ad for a 3 bed 2 bath home on 20 acres.  It caught my eye and I opened the ad, It is still here in Lincoln and it was like a dream come true.  In our budget too.  So I sent them an email and figured since the ad was 4 days old that it was already rented due to the fact that homes around here on acreage DO not last long especially at that great of a price.  I got an email back the next day saying that it was still available and to call them.  So we did and well the rest is history. We got to go look at it and fell in love.  The owners are an elderly couple who are just absolutely so sweet and kind.  They live on the 20 acres as well.  The property is fenced and overlooks the town of Lincoln and you can even see the Sutter Buttes from the house.  They have a beautiful pond on the property as well.  We got to go in and look at the home and it is HUGE over 1400 sq. feet and sooo nice.  I cannot wait to start our life out there.  It has a oversized 2 car garage.  They have a 8 stall barn, lighted arena, and a hay barn as well.  Since they are elderly they sold all their horses and are happy to be renting to someone who will possibly be owning a horse in the near future.  I want my girls to have that experience like I did.  They are open to animals even for the girls to do 4-H.

I cannot tell you how excited we are,  girls are excited too but they are just concerned about having to move schools which I will not do to them in the middle of the school year.  Next year they will go to the school closer to us and probably ride the bus.  Hannah doesn't want to ride the bus but she says she will, she says she doesn't want to have to keep her sisters in check. lol  God I love her!!  Our last day as city folks is December 10th and then we become country bumpkins.  I was born and raised a country bumpkin so this is not new to me,  Steve on the other hand is a total city boy but he has been wanting out of the city for some time now.  Just to have some peace and quiet.  Moving this close to Christmas is going to suck but we will be ok.  We will make do. Now the packing begins.. fun!  Anyone who wants to help pack come on over.. I will supply the food and drinks.. lol lol

Finally good news!!

Wordless Wednesday...

Wordless Wednesday...

I've learned..

*I’ve learned…That when you’re in love, it shows.

*I’ve learned…That just one person saying to me, “You’ve made my day!” makes my day.

*I’ve learned…That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

*I’ve learned…That being kind is more important than being right.

*I’ve learned…That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

*I’ve learned…That I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.

*I’ve learned…That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

*I’ve learned…That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

*I’ve learned…That simple walks with my father on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

*I’ve learned…That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

*I’ve learned…That we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

*I’ve learned…That money doesn’t buy class.

*I’ve learned…That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

*I’ve learned…That under everyone’s hard shell there is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

*I’ve learned…That the Lord didn’t do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?

*I’ve learned…That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

*I’ve learned…That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

*I’ve learned…That love, not time, heals all wounds.

*I’ve learned…That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

*I’ve learned…That there’s nothing sweeter than sleeping with your babies and feeling their breath on your cheeks.

*I’ve learned…That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

*I’ve learned…That life is tough, but I’m tougher.

*I’ve learned…That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

*I’ve learned…That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

*I’ve learned…That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

*I’ve learned…That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

*I’ve learned…That I can’t choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it.

*I’ve learned…That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.

*I’ve learned …That it is best to give advice in only two circumstances; when it is requested and when it is a life threatening situation.

*I’ve learned…That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

I've learned..

*I’ve learned…That when you’re in love, it shows.

*I’ve learned…That just one person saying to me, “You’ve made my day!” makes my day.

*I’ve learned…That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

*I’ve learned…That being kind is more important than being right.

*I’ve learned…That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

*I’ve learned…That I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.

*I’ve learned…That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

*I’ve learned…That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

*I’ve learned…That simple walks with my father on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

*I’ve learned…That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

*I’ve learned…That we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

*I’ve learned…That money doesn’t buy class.

*I’ve learned…That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

*I’ve learned…That under everyone’s hard shell there is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

*I’ve learned…That the Lord didn’t do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?

*I’ve learned…That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

*I’ve learned…That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

*I’ve learned…That love, not time, heals all wounds.

*I’ve learned…That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

*I’ve learned…That there’s nothing sweeter than sleeping with your babies and feeling their breath on your cheeks.

*I’ve learned…That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

*I’ve learned…That life is tough, but I’m tougher.

*I’ve learned…That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

*I’ve learned…That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

*I’ve learned…That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

*I’ve learned…That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

*I’ve learned…That I can’t choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it.

*I’ve learned…That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.

*I’ve learned …That it is best to give advice in only two circumstances; when it is requested and when it is a life threatening situation.

*I’ve learned…That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

Zombie family

I found this cool app on my phone that turns us into zombies.. it's really cool.

Zombie family

I found this cool app on my phone that turns us into zombies.. it's really cool.

Family is everything...

On Saturday November 5th, 2011 I finally got to meet Steve's dad.  Since the day I met Steve him and his dad had some disagreements and were not talking.  They have recently resolved their problems and I am very happy for Steve that he is talking to his dad again.  I know this has bothered him a lot and I very happy I finally got the chance to meet him.  It was a great visit and I look forward to getting to know him more. In the three years we have been together I have never met his dad only heard about him,  I feel like another chapter has been closed and we are getting more and more complete.  I really wish his mom was still around from what I hear from Steve she was an amazing woman. As I get older I realize more and more how much family really means.. family is everything to me and I love my family.

I plan to keep my family close to my heart forever!!  :)

Family is everything...

On Saturday November 5th, 2011 I finally got to meet Steve's dad.  Since the day I met Steve him and his dad had some disagreements and were not talking.  They have recently resolved their problems and I am very happy for Steve that he is talking to his dad again.  I know this has bothered him a lot and I very happy I finally got the chance to meet him.  It was a great visit and I look forward to getting to know him more. In the three years we have been together I have never met his dad only heard about him,  I feel like another chapter has been closed and we are getting more and more complete.  I really wish his mom was still around from what I hear from Steve she was an amazing woman. As I get older I realize more and more how much family really means.. family is everything to me and I love my family.

I plan to keep my family close to my heart forever!!  :)

The day I married ...

On November 1st, 2011 I married my best friend, my lover of 3 years.  It seemed like forever for the day to arrive.  I woke up on Tuesday morning and had a meeting with a good friend of mine to get our nails and hair done.  My nerves were getting the best of me. My friend of many years Sara and I went to the salon and started getting pampered and ready for my BIG day,  I started reminiscing and telling Sara all about how and when he proposed .. He took me to a Rascal Flats concert front row seats YEAH! I was so excited I had never been to a concert with front row seats.  Half way through the concert Rascal Flats lead singer comes out onto stage and says they have a special message they want to share on their big screens and on the screens in his own handwriting it read "Judi will you marry me? Love your fragile man. I couldn't believe my eyes,  I just started crying, The lead singer handed the microphone down to Steve and he asked me again as he got down on his knees and pulled out a beautiful yet simple diamond ring and I said yes, YES!  Then Rascal Flats says this song is dedicated to Steve and Judi, congrats on your engagement. And they sang "God Bless The Broken Road."   I was so happy I couldn't stop smiling. After the song was over the lead singer of the band says we have one more surprise,  Steve wanted to share this special moment with your family and on the screen was my mom, and sisters.. I just started crying. I couldn't believe it.   Sara was all smiles too as I finished the story, she said you have a great man you are marrying today. My girls also got there hair done up all pretty.. they were not in the wedding but they got to be in nice dresses and got their nails and hair done.

After we were all dolled up and ready for my big day Sara and I headed to the beach, I have always dreamed of getting married on the beach .. barefoot.  We got married in Morro Bay, Ca on the beautiful sandy beach.. in a white wedding gown that hung off my shoulders and was fitted all the way down to my knees then flowed out with a gorgeous long train. My hair was done mostly up with beautiful curls falling on my freckly shoulders.  My one and only maid of honor wore a beautiful teal and brown gown that matched the best mans shirt and slacks.  The warm sand between my bare feet was so nice it almost took away all my nerves. My bouquet was just beautiful, had a mixture of flowers. Bright and beautiful flowers.  The groom looked fantastic, he was wearing black slacks and a white button up with a teal tie to match the party., of course we were all barefoot.  My Dad looked sharp in his khaki slacks and Hawaiin shirt. As he walked me down the aisle my eyes locked on my soon to be husband and I had to fight back tears, my Dad handed my hand over to my soon to be husband and kissed my cheek. Steve lips the words, you look absolutely beautiful. I smile and lip back "thank you:" We had our own vows, I only remember part of them "I promise to love you in good times and in bad, when life seems easy and when it seems hard, when our love is simple, and when it is an effort. I promise to cherish you, and to always hold you in highest regard."
... I pronounce you husband and wife,  you may now kiss the bride.

And we walked away hand in hand as a married couple...

IT WAS ONLY JUST A DREAM!!!  A very vivid dream at that..... wow!

The day I married ...

On November 1st, 2011 I married my best friend, my lover of 3 years.  It seemed like forever for the day to arrive.  I woke up on Tuesday morning and had a meeting with a good friend of mine to get our nails and hair done.  My nerves were getting the best of me. My friend of many years Sara and I went to the salon and started getting pampered and ready for my BIG day,  I started reminiscing and telling Sara all about how and when he proposed .. He took me to a Rascal Flats concert front row seats YEAH! I was so excited I had never been to a concert with front row seats.  Half way through the concert Rascal Flats lead singer comes out onto stage and says they have a special message they want to share on their big screens and on the screens in his own handwriting it read "Judi will you marry me? Love your fragile man. I couldn't believe my eyes,  I just started crying, The lead singer handed the microphone down to Steve and he asked me again as he got down on his knees and pulled out a beautiful yet simple diamond ring and I said yes, YES!  Then Rascal Flats says this song is dedicated to Steve and Judi, congrats on your engagement. And they sang "God Bless The Broken Road."   I was so happy I couldn't stop smiling. After the song was over the lead singer of the band says we have one more surprise,  Steve wanted to share this special moment with your family and on the screen was my mom, and sisters.. I just started crying. I couldn't believe it.   Sara was all smiles too as I finished the story, she said you have a great man you are marrying today. My girls also got there hair done up all pretty.. they were not in the wedding but they got to be in nice dresses and got their nails and hair done.

After we were all dolled up and ready for my big day Sara and I headed to the beach, I have always dreamed of getting married on the beach .. barefoot.  We got married in Morro Bay, Ca on the beautiful sandy beach.. in a white wedding gown that hung off my shoulders and was fitted all the way down to my knees then flowed out with a gorgeous long train. My hair was done mostly up with beautiful curls falling on my freckly shoulders.  My one and only maid of honor wore a beautiful teal and brown gown that matched the best mans shirt and slacks.  The warm sand between my bare feet was so nice it almost took away all my nerves. My bouquet was just beautiful, had a mixture of flowers. Bright and beautiful flowers.  The groom looked fantastic, he was wearing black slacks and a white button up with a teal tie to match the party., of course we were all barefoot.  My Dad looked sharp in his khaki slacks and Hawaiin shirt. As he walked me down the aisle my eyes locked on my soon to be husband and I had to fight back tears, my Dad handed my hand over to my soon to be husband and kissed my cheek. Steve lips the words, you look absolutely beautiful. I smile and lip back "thank you:" We had our own vows, I only remember part of them "I promise to love you in good times and in bad, when life seems easy and when it seems hard, when our love is simple, and when it is an effort. I promise to cherish you, and to always hold you in highest regard."
... I pronounce you husband and wife,  you may now kiss the bride.

And we walked away hand in hand as a married couple...

IT WAS ONLY JUST A DREAM!!!  A very vivid dream at that..... wow!

A little change...

I think,  lol  I have added a link on my blogger to my Project 365-A question a day... I thought it would be much easier than mixing all those days and posts with my personal blog.  So I hope you will all continue to follow my project 365. :)  The link is on my main page upper left hand corner ..

A little change...

I think,  lol  I have added a link on my blogger to my Project 365-A question a day... I thought it would be much easier than mixing all those days and posts with my personal blog.  So I hope you will all continue to follow my project 365. :)  The link is on my main page upper left hand corner ..

Self Esteem

I have always struggled with self esteem issues,  and this article I stumbled upon is so true and me to a tee almost.  It sucks being self conscience and having self esteem issues,  This is constantly something I try and work on..  I hope you enjoy the article...

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When I refer to  low self-esteem...I am not talking about just another whimsical moment when one feels a little bit out of sorts or a typical bad hair day...I am referring to  a persons mind feeling like it is caught up in such a whirlwind of self doubt that no matter how many times they try to grab hold of something to stop this rollercoaster of self-doubt...they instantly lose their grip. They cannot comprehend the importance of loving thyself first or unconditional self-love.

Guys, I am sure some, maybe even many of you can relate  to the fact that it is very frustrating to try and deal with a woman that feels less than, like she is a nobody or that she will never be enough for you. Her main focus is totally on your love and acceptance other than her own!
No matter what you say or do to encourage her, you feel like your words have fallen upon deaf ears. You try very hard to show that you are very  interested soley in her and that she is exactly who you desire and still, she somehow manages to interpret it the wrong way. You end up dealing with serious jealousy issues over things that only she can see and you yourself end up beginning to feel like you have failed her in some way.

Well, if you think it is frustrating for you, imagine what she is dealing with every second she breathes. Having  low self-esteem is a very serious issue...........................

She wakes up with it, she goes throughout her entire day with it, she even goes to sleep at night with it.
It does not take a break or wait to be invited in.
If she cannot identify with it, she will become very skeptical, non-trusting, defensive and aggressive towards everyone who tries to help.
It tears at and feeds on her every attempt to feel good about who she is and her own ability to accept herself. It meets her at every corner and changes it direction to confuse her even more. It truly is a mind game of the worst kind.

When a woman suffers from a low self-esteem, it is similar to an addiction which can only be satisfied with a continuous flow of reassurance that she is acceptable and worthy to you. She will do anything she can to feel this acceptance from you, even if it goes against her morals and standards. It is demeaning her subconsciously while you are both engaged in sexual enjoyment to a point that she will eventually turn away from it.
That and her desperate need of acceptance will eventually begin to drain you as her partner and you will begin to find any reason to not be around her...hence the relationship begins to fail.

This entrapped feeling does not only affect the relationships at home, it also follows her into her work place, where she is being suffocated and preoccupied with this desperate need to hide from everyone.

Think about the importance of having a high self-esteem in ones work place. Ones self-esteem needs to be high so that their confidence can guide them through actions such as: making important decisions, dealings with opposite sex bosses, good old office politics, other staff trying to gain on your efforts, dealing with clients or customers, dealing with criticism regarding your work, and even just making friends.

How does a person get imprisoned by a low self-esteem?
Initially it has been proven that the seed is sown at some point in ones life. As a child...It can be from verbal or physical abuse, witnessing a parent or a sibling being tormented, bullied and or humiliated continuously. As an adult...Being rejected or emotionally abused by a partner. All of these experiences are traumatic and will damage if not totally crush ones ability to to have unconditional self-love which in turn imprisons them in a pit of low self-esteem.

What can you do to help your partner?
It is without a doubt your partners responsibility to identify with the negative issues that have caused her loss of self-love.
This does not mean that you cannot support her and understand yourself that it is not an attack against you personally.
You can be patient and understanding when she is stuck in this horrible place and her only way of out might be through you.
Talking softly and non-accusing is the only way to help a person find their way out of the darkness.
You can help her rebuild her self-esteem by bringing out her values and goodness that she is having trouble seeing.
It is also very important not to belittle or underestimate the seriousness of low self-esteem.
A person imprisoned in this is not there voluntarily and more than not are unaware of it until it finally comes to the forefront and they can begin to identify with it.
Do not over emphasize her abilities or over compliment as they will not be as effective. Choose your timing well.

What can she do to help herself?
It is vital that she becomes able to identify with the negative thoughts that are in control of her mind.
These thoughts are what keep her down and they will gain more strength each time she allows them to take over.
She must commit to taking control of her thoughts in order to actually be successful at changing them.
She must learn to question her thoughts: eg..will this change my life or hurt me in any way?
She can see a professional ....they can be of some help in guiding her in bringing forth a lot of hidden trauma which will in turn help her to identify with a lot of the negative thoughts that have her trapped.
She can get involved in any type of self-satisfying project...starting small and eventually challenging herself with bigger ones as her self-esteem begins to strengthen.
She must also know that this is not a quick fix issue. It will take time and consistent effort in taking control of each and every thought she has until her mind subconscious chooses the positive ones.

In a relationship, when one partner is suffering, both partners are indeed suffering. What one person brings to a relationship affects the other partner. Understand without any room to argue...it is vital that you take care of who you are before you decide to commit to sharing a life with another person. If you are in a relationship and your partner suffers seriously from any type of issue...being their partner does demand a certain amount of loyalty and even sacrifice to stand by them and support them in any way. Remember they are who you chose to share your life with through better or worse!

Self Esteem

I have always struggled with self esteem issues,  and this article I stumbled upon is so true and me to a tee almost.  It sucks being self conscience and having self esteem issues,  This is constantly something I try and work on..  I hope you enjoy the article...

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When I refer to  low self-esteem...I am not talking about just another whimsical moment when one feels a little bit out of sorts or a typical bad hair day...I am referring to  a persons mind feeling like it is caught up in such a whirlwind of self doubt that no matter how many times they try to grab hold of something to stop this rollercoaster of self-doubt...they instantly lose their grip. They cannot comprehend the importance of loving thyself first or unconditional self-love.

Guys, I am sure some, maybe even many of you can relate  to the fact that it is very frustrating to try and deal with a woman that feels less than, like she is a nobody or that she will never be enough for you. Her main focus is totally on your love and acceptance other than her own!
No matter what you say or do to encourage her, you feel like your words have fallen upon deaf ears. You try very hard to show that you are very  interested soley in her and that she is exactly who you desire and still, she somehow manages to interpret it the wrong way. You end up dealing with serious jealousy issues over things that only she can see and you yourself end up beginning to feel like you have failed her in some way.

Well, if you think it is frustrating for you, imagine what she is dealing with every second she breathes. Having  low self-esteem is a very serious issue...........................

She wakes up with it, she goes throughout her entire day with it, she even goes to sleep at night with it.
It does not take a break or wait to be invited in.
If she cannot identify with it, she will become very skeptical, non-trusting, defensive and aggressive towards everyone who tries to help.
It tears at and feeds on her every attempt to feel good about who she is and her own ability to accept herself. It meets her at every corner and changes it direction to confuse her even more. It truly is a mind game of the worst kind.

When a woman suffers from a low self-esteem, it is similar to an addiction which can only be satisfied with a continuous flow of reassurance that she is acceptable and worthy to you. She will do anything she can to feel this acceptance from you, even if it goes against her morals and standards. It is demeaning her subconsciously while you are both engaged in sexual enjoyment to a point that she will eventually turn away from it.
That and her desperate need of acceptance will eventually begin to drain you as her partner and you will begin to find any reason to not be around her...hence the relationship begins to fail.

This entrapped feeling does not only affect the relationships at home, it also follows her into her work place, where she is being suffocated and preoccupied with this desperate need to hide from everyone.

Think about the importance of having a high self-esteem in ones work place. Ones self-esteem needs to be high so that their confidence can guide them through actions such as: making important decisions, dealings with opposite sex bosses, good old office politics, other staff trying to gain on your efforts, dealing with clients or customers, dealing with criticism regarding your work, and even just making friends.

How does a person get imprisoned by a low self-esteem?
Initially it has been proven that the seed is sown at some point in ones life. As a child...It can be from verbal or physical abuse, witnessing a parent or a sibling being tormented, bullied and or humiliated continuously. As an adult...Being rejected or emotionally abused by a partner. All of these experiences are traumatic and will damage if not totally crush ones ability to to have unconditional self-love which in turn imprisons them in a pit of low self-esteem.

What can you do to help your partner?
It is without a doubt your partners responsibility to identify with the negative issues that have caused her loss of self-love.
This does not mean that you cannot support her and understand yourself that it is not an attack against you personally.
You can be patient and understanding when she is stuck in this horrible place and her only way of out might be through you.
Talking softly and non-accusing is the only way to help a person find their way out of the darkness.
You can help her rebuild her self-esteem by bringing out her values and goodness that she is having trouble seeing.
It is also very important not to belittle or underestimate the seriousness of low self-esteem.
A person imprisoned in this is not there voluntarily and more than not are unaware of it until it finally comes to the forefront and they can begin to identify with it.
Do not over emphasize her abilities or over compliment as they will not be as effective. Choose your timing well.

What can she do to help herself?
It is vital that she becomes able to identify with the negative thoughts that are in control of her mind.
These thoughts are what keep her down and they will gain more strength each time she allows them to take over.
She must commit to taking control of her thoughts in order to actually be successful at changing them.
She must learn to question her thoughts: eg..will this change my life or hurt me in any way?
She can see a professional ....they can be of some help in guiding her in bringing forth a lot of hidden trauma which will in turn help her to identify with a lot of the negative thoughts that have her trapped.
She can get involved in any type of self-satisfying project...starting small and eventually challenging herself with bigger ones as her self-esteem begins to strengthen.
She must also know that this is not a quick fix issue. It will take time and consistent effort in taking control of each and every thought she has until her mind subconscious chooses the positive ones.

In a relationship, when one partner is suffering, both partners are indeed suffering. What one person brings to a relationship affects the other partner. Understand without any room to argue...it is vital that you take care of who you are before you decide to commit to sharing a life with another person. If you are in a relationship and your partner suffers seriously from any type of issue...being their partner does demand a certain amount of loyalty and even sacrifice to stand by them and support them in any way. Remember they are who you chose to share your life with through better or worse!