The day I married ...

On November 1st, 2011 I married my best friend, my lover of 3 years.  It seemed like forever for the day to arrive.  I woke up on Tuesday morning and had a meeting with a good friend of mine to get our nails and hair done.  My nerves were getting the best of me. My friend of many years Sara and I went to the salon and started getting pampered and ready for my BIG day,  I started reminiscing and telling Sara all about how and when he proposed .. He took me to a Rascal Flats concert front row seats YEAH! I was so excited I had never been to a concert with front row seats.  Half way through the concert Rascal Flats lead singer comes out onto stage and says they have a special message they want to share on their big screens and on the screens in his own handwriting it read "Judi will you marry me? Love your fragile man. I couldn't believe my eyes,  I just started crying, The lead singer handed the microphone down to Steve and he asked me again as he got down on his knees and pulled out a beautiful yet simple diamond ring and I said yes, YES!  Then Rascal Flats says this song is dedicated to Steve and Judi, congrats on your engagement. And they sang "God Bless The Broken Road."   I was so happy I couldn't stop smiling. After the song was over the lead singer of the band says we have one more surprise,  Steve wanted to share this special moment with your family and on the screen was my mom, and sisters.. I just started crying. I couldn't believe it.   Sara was all smiles too as I finished the story, she said you have a great man you are marrying today. My girls also got there hair done up all pretty.. they were not in the wedding but they got to be in nice dresses and got their nails and hair done.

After we were all dolled up and ready for my big day Sara and I headed to the beach, I have always dreamed of getting married on the beach .. barefoot.  We got married in Morro Bay, Ca on the beautiful sandy beach.. in a white wedding gown that hung off my shoulders and was fitted all the way down to my knees then flowed out with a gorgeous long train. My hair was done mostly up with beautiful curls falling on my freckly shoulders.  My one and only maid of honor wore a beautiful teal and brown gown that matched the best mans shirt and slacks.  The warm sand between my bare feet was so nice it almost took away all my nerves. My bouquet was just beautiful, had a mixture of flowers. Bright and beautiful flowers.  The groom looked fantastic, he was wearing black slacks and a white button up with a teal tie to match the party., of course we were all barefoot.  My Dad looked sharp in his khaki slacks and Hawaiin shirt. As he walked me down the aisle my eyes locked on my soon to be husband and I had to fight back tears, my Dad handed my hand over to my soon to be husband and kissed my cheek. Steve lips the words, you look absolutely beautiful. I smile and lip back "thank you:" We had our own vows, I only remember part of them "I promise to love you in good times and in bad, when life seems easy and when it seems hard, when our love is simple, and when it is an effort. I promise to cherish you, and to always hold you in highest regard."
... I pronounce you husband and wife,  you may now kiss the bride.

And we walked away hand in hand as a married couple...

IT WAS ONLY JUST A DREAM!!!  A very vivid dream at that..... wow!

The day I married ...

On November 1st, 2011 I married my best friend, my lover of 3 years.  It seemed like forever for the day to arrive.  I woke up on Tuesday morning and had a meeting with a good friend of mine to get our nails and hair done.  My nerves were getting the best of me. My friend of many years Sara and I went to the salon and started getting pampered and ready for my BIG day,  I started reminiscing and telling Sara all about how and when he proposed .. He took me to a Rascal Flats concert front row seats YEAH! I was so excited I had never been to a concert with front row seats.  Half way through the concert Rascal Flats lead singer comes out onto stage and says they have a special message they want to share on their big screens and on the screens in his own handwriting it read "Judi will you marry me? Love your fragile man. I couldn't believe my eyes,  I just started crying, The lead singer handed the microphone down to Steve and he asked me again as he got down on his knees and pulled out a beautiful yet simple diamond ring and I said yes, YES!  Then Rascal Flats says this song is dedicated to Steve and Judi, congrats on your engagement. And they sang "God Bless The Broken Road."   I was so happy I couldn't stop smiling. After the song was over the lead singer of the band says we have one more surprise,  Steve wanted to share this special moment with your family and on the screen was my mom, and sisters.. I just started crying. I couldn't believe it.   Sara was all smiles too as I finished the story, she said you have a great man you are marrying today. My girls also got there hair done up all pretty.. they were not in the wedding but they got to be in nice dresses and got their nails and hair done.

After we were all dolled up and ready for my big day Sara and I headed to the beach, I have always dreamed of getting married on the beach .. barefoot.  We got married in Morro Bay, Ca on the beautiful sandy beach.. in a white wedding gown that hung off my shoulders and was fitted all the way down to my knees then flowed out with a gorgeous long train. My hair was done mostly up with beautiful curls falling on my freckly shoulders.  My one and only maid of honor wore a beautiful teal and brown gown that matched the best mans shirt and slacks.  The warm sand between my bare feet was so nice it almost took away all my nerves. My bouquet was just beautiful, had a mixture of flowers. Bright and beautiful flowers.  The groom looked fantastic, he was wearing black slacks and a white button up with a teal tie to match the party., of course we were all barefoot.  My Dad looked sharp in his khaki slacks and Hawaiin shirt. As he walked me down the aisle my eyes locked on my soon to be husband and I had to fight back tears, my Dad handed my hand over to my soon to be husband and kissed my cheek. Steve lips the words, you look absolutely beautiful. I smile and lip back "thank you:" We had our own vows, I only remember part of them "I promise to love you in good times and in bad, when life seems easy and when it seems hard, when our love is simple, and when it is an effort. I promise to cherish you, and to always hold you in highest regard."
... I pronounce you husband and wife,  you may now kiss the bride.

And we walked away hand in hand as a married couple...

IT WAS ONLY JUST A DREAM!!!  A very vivid dream at that..... wow!

A little change...

I think,  lol  I have added a link on my blogger to my Project 365-A question a day... I thought it would be much easier than mixing all those days and posts with my personal blog.  So I hope you will all continue to follow my project 365. :)  The link is on my main page upper left hand corner ..

A little change...

I think,  lol  I have added a link on my blogger to my Project 365-A question a day... I thought it would be much easier than mixing all those days and posts with my personal blog.  So I hope you will all continue to follow my project 365. :)  The link is on my main page upper left hand corner ..

Self Esteem

I have always struggled with self esteem issues,  and this article I stumbled upon is so true and me to a tee almost.  It sucks being self conscience and having self esteem issues,  This is constantly something I try and work on..  I hope you enjoy the article...

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When I refer to  low self-esteem...I am not talking about just another whimsical moment when one feels a little bit out of sorts or a typical bad hair day...I am referring to  a persons mind feeling like it is caught up in such a whirlwind of self doubt that no matter how many times they try to grab hold of something to stop this rollercoaster of self-doubt...they instantly lose their grip. They cannot comprehend the importance of loving thyself first or unconditional self-love.

Guys, I am sure some, maybe even many of you can relate  to the fact that it is very frustrating to try and deal with a woman that feels less than, like she is a nobody or that she will never be enough for you. Her main focus is totally on your love and acceptance other than her own!
No matter what you say or do to encourage her, you feel like your words have fallen upon deaf ears. You try very hard to show that you are very  interested soley in her and that she is exactly who you desire and still, she somehow manages to interpret it the wrong way. You end up dealing with serious jealousy issues over things that only she can see and you yourself end up beginning to feel like you have failed her in some way.

Well, if you think it is frustrating for you, imagine what she is dealing with every second she breathes. Having  low self-esteem is a very serious issue...........................

She wakes up with it, she goes throughout her entire day with it, she even goes to sleep at night with it.
It does not take a break or wait to be invited in.
If she cannot identify with it, she will become very skeptical, non-trusting, defensive and aggressive towards everyone who tries to help.
It tears at and feeds on her every attempt to feel good about who she is and her own ability to accept herself. It meets her at every corner and changes it direction to confuse her even more. It truly is a mind game of the worst kind.

When a woman suffers from a low self-esteem, it is similar to an addiction which can only be satisfied with a continuous flow of reassurance that she is acceptable and worthy to you. She will do anything she can to feel this acceptance from you, even if it goes against her morals and standards. It is demeaning her subconsciously while you are both engaged in sexual enjoyment to a point that she will eventually turn away from it.
That and her desperate need of acceptance will eventually begin to drain you as her partner and you will begin to find any reason to not be around her...hence the relationship begins to fail.

This entrapped feeling does not only affect the relationships at home, it also follows her into her work place, where she is being suffocated and preoccupied with this desperate need to hide from everyone.

Think about the importance of having a high self-esteem in ones work place. Ones self-esteem needs to be high so that their confidence can guide them through actions such as: making important decisions, dealings with opposite sex bosses, good old office politics, other staff trying to gain on your efforts, dealing with clients or customers, dealing with criticism regarding your work, and even just making friends.

How does a person get imprisoned by a low self-esteem?
Initially it has been proven that the seed is sown at some point in ones life. As a child...It can be from verbal or physical abuse, witnessing a parent or a sibling being tormented, bullied and or humiliated continuously. As an adult...Being rejected or emotionally abused by a partner. All of these experiences are traumatic and will damage if not totally crush ones ability to to have unconditional self-love which in turn imprisons them in a pit of low self-esteem.

What can you do to help your partner?
It is without a doubt your partners responsibility to identify with the negative issues that have caused her loss of self-love.
This does not mean that you cannot support her and understand yourself that it is not an attack against you personally.
You can be patient and understanding when she is stuck in this horrible place and her only way of out might be through you.
Talking softly and non-accusing is the only way to help a person find their way out of the darkness.
You can help her rebuild her self-esteem by bringing out her values and goodness that she is having trouble seeing.
It is also very important not to belittle or underestimate the seriousness of low self-esteem.
A person imprisoned in this is not there voluntarily and more than not are unaware of it until it finally comes to the forefront and they can begin to identify with it.
Do not over emphasize her abilities or over compliment as they will not be as effective. Choose your timing well.

What can she do to help herself?
It is vital that she becomes able to identify with the negative thoughts that are in control of her mind.
These thoughts are what keep her down and they will gain more strength each time she allows them to take over.
She must commit to taking control of her thoughts in order to actually be successful at changing them.
She must learn to question her thoughts: eg..will this change my life or hurt me in any way?
She can see a professional ....they can be of some help in guiding her in bringing forth a lot of hidden trauma which will in turn help her to identify with a lot of the negative thoughts that have her trapped.
She can get involved in any type of self-satisfying project...starting small and eventually challenging herself with bigger ones as her self-esteem begins to strengthen.
She must also know that this is not a quick fix issue. It will take time and consistent effort in taking control of each and every thought she has until her mind subconscious chooses the positive ones.

In a relationship, when one partner is suffering, both partners are indeed suffering. What one person brings to a relationship affects the other partner. Understand without any room to argue...it is vital that you take care of who you are before you decide to commit to sharing a life with another person. If you are in a relationship and your partner suffers seriously from any type of issue...being their partner does demand a certain amount of loyalty and even sacrifice to stand by them and support them in any way. Remember they are who you chose to share your life with through better or worse!

Self Esteem

I have always struggled with self esteem issues,  and this article I stumbled upon is so true and me to a tee almost.  It sucks being self conscience and having self esteem issues,  This is constantly something I try and work on..  I hope you enjoy the article...

.

.

.

.

.

When I refer to  low self-esteem...I am not talking about just another whimsical moment when one feels a little bit out of sorts or a typical bad hair day...I am referring to  a persons mind feeling like it is caught up in such a whirlwind of self doubt that no matter how many times they try to grab hold of something to stop this rollercoaster of self-doubt...they instantly lose their grip. They cannot comprehend the importance of loving thyself first or unconditional self-love.

Guys, I am sure some, maybe even many of you can relate  to the fact that it is very frustrating to try and deal with a woman that feels less than, like she is a nobody or that she will never be enough for you. Her main focus is totally on your love and acceptance other than her own!
No matter what you say or do to encourage her, you feel like your words have fallen upon deaf ears. You try very hard to show that you are very  interested soley in her and that she is exactly who you desire and still, she somehow manages to interpret it the wrong way. You end up dealing with serious jealousy issues over things that only she can see and you yourself end up beginning to feel like you have failed her in some way.

Well, if you think it is frustrating for you, imagine what she is dealing with every second she breathes. Having  low self-esteem is a very serious issue...........................

She wakes up with it, she goes throughout her entire day with it, she even goes to sleep at night with it.
It does not take a break or wait to be invited in.
If she cannot identify with it, she will become very skeptical, non-trusting, defensive and aggressive towards everyone who tries to help.
It tears at and feeds on her every attempt to feel good about who she is and her own ability to accept herself. It meets her at every corner and changes it direction to confuse her even more. It truly is a mind game of the worst kind.

When a woman suffers from a low self-esteem, it is similar to an addiction which can only be satisfied with a continuous flow of reassurance that she is acceptable and worthy to you. She will do anything she can to feel this acceptance from you, even if it goes against her morals and standards. It is demeaning her subconsciously while you are both engaged in sexual enjoyment to a point that she will eventually turn away from it.
That and her desperate need of acceptance will eventually begin to drain you as her partner and you will begin to find any reason to not be around her...hence the relationship begins to fail.

This entrapped feeling does not only affect the relationships at home, it also follows her into her work place, where she is being suffocated and preoccupied with this desperate need to hide from everyone.

Think about the importance of having a high self-esteem in ones work place. Ones self-esteem needs to be high so that their confidence can guide them through actions such as: making important decisions, dealings with opposite sex bosses, good old office politics, other staff trying to gain on your efforts, dealing with clients or customers, dealing with criticism regarding your work, and even just making friends.

How does a person get imprisoned by a low self-esteem?
Initially it has been proven that the seed is sown at some point in ones life. As a child...It can be from verbal or physical abuse, witnessing a parent or a sibling being tormented, bullied and or humiliated continuously. As an adult...Being rejected or emotionally abused by a partner. All of these experiences are traumatic and will damage if not totally crush ones ability to to have unconditional self-love which in turn imprisons them in a pit of low self-esteem.

What can you do to help your partner?
It is without a doubt your partners responsibility to identify with the negative issues that have caused her loss of self-love.
This does not mean that you cannot support her and understand yourself that it is not an attack against you personally.
You can be patient and understanding when she is stuck in this horrible place and her only way of out might be through you.
Talking softly and non-accusing is the only way to help a person find their way out of the darkness.
You can help her rebuild her self-esteem by bringing out her values and goodness that she is having trouble seeing.
It is also very important not to belittle or underestimate the seriousness of low self-esteem.
A person imprisoned in this is not there voluntarily and more than not are unaware of it until it finally comes to the forefront and they can begin to identify with it.
Do not over emphasize her abilities or over compliment as they will not be as effective. Choose your timing well.

What can she do to help herself?
It is vital that she becomes able to identify with the negative thoughts that are in control of her mind.
These thoughts are what keep her down and they will gain more strength each time she allows them to take over.
She must commit to taking control of her thoughts in order to actually be successful at changing them.
She must learn to question her thoughts: eg..will this change my life or hurt me in any way?
She can see a professional ....they can be of some help in guiding her in bringing forth a lot of hidden trauma which will in turn help her to identify with a lot of the negative thoughts that have her trapped.
She can get involved in any type of self-satisfying project...starting small and eventually challenging herself with bigger ones as her self-esteem begins to strengthen.
She must also know that this is not a quick fix issue. It will take time and consistent effort in taking control of each and every thought she has until her mind subconscious chooses the positive ones.

In a relationship, when one partner is suffering, both partners are indeed suffering. What one person brings to a relationship affects the other partner. Understand without any room to argue...it is vital that you take care of who you are before you decide to commit to sharing a life with another person. If you are in a relationship and your partner suffers seriously from any type of issue...being their partner does demand a certain amount of loyalty and even sacrifice to stand by them and support them in any way. Remember they are who you chose to share your life with through better or worse!

Bishops Pumpkin Patch

Yesterday I took the girls out to Bishops Pumpkin Patch, we go every year and have a blast just the 4 of us normally. The girls love it out there and so do I, great photo opps. :) We rode the train, fed the animals, and picked out a perfect pumpkin....an all white one this year.  Something a little different.

Here are a few photos: