After spending hours in the ER for a migraine I came home thinking I would just pass out. Nope. I layed here in my bed. Empty bed. Just me.. staring at the ceiling. Telling myself over and over and over "You will be fine" GOD dammit this pisses me off ... the hurt pisses me off. I am pissed at myself for allowing this to happen. Why?! How?! Could I let this happen and open myself up to such a vulnerable position. I knew better. I think we even discussed this over and over and when he left that morning I knew. I was extremely insecure but oh well what can I do. So I made it through my first night alone again and I will be ok. I know I will. I woke up with a pretty positive attitude. Ready to face this day and what it has to offer. I am even ready to face work tonight... I can do it. I realized that seeing him at work will be ok. I will be ok with it. I am there to do my job and just go home. It helps me so much to sit here and write about this. And I know there is only two of you who read these stupid postings of mine... but the fact is I can get it off my chest here and that helps. So here is to a new day and hopefully a good positive attitude all day. :) Happy Hump Day ... :)
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